Why Hello There...

So I just so happened upon this blog today, while cleaning up some things on my Facebook profile.

I had completely forgotten about it, and was like, "I have a blog...?" XD

Looking at the years, quite some time has passed, and things are very different. I suppose now is a good as time as any to pick this back up. I intend to keep this blog as a fitness/workout/weigh loss motivational space for myself - and any one else who wants to read.

Truth be told, I have fallen off the workout bandwagon. And I was on a roll, let me tell you!

I lost 50+ pounds, and now - more than 4 years later, I have gained it ALL back and then some, probably. My fight to get enthused with exercise was slow and unfulfilling for a while. I tried a new program here and there for a few days, before I gave up. I didn't want to wake up that early to workout, or I didn't have time after work, or my work was too stressful, blah blah blah - excuses, excuses. I ordered many a program, and went to an all-womens gym the beginning of the year, but I was in a slump. Still am, kinda. One day, I realized I just didn't like feeling the way I was feeling all the time. Unhappy. Tired. And somewhat anxious for no reason.

Today (Saturday) will mark the end of the first week of Month #2 of my fitness journey, courtesy of Insanity:MAX 30. When I first moved to Maryland, I bought an old copy of the original Insanity from an Ebay action. My sister and her friend tried the workouts in her basement (her friends) for 3 days, and then we gave up.

And I decided I needed to give myself a start date to take the program seriously and stick with it. That year, I completed the Insanity Program multiple times, did crazy meal prep, tracked crazy calories, and consequently, started what would be the beginning of my time as a vegetarian for about 1.5 years.

I really was in very fit "state" if you will - but I could never see it. I never thought I was small enough, I was afraid missing one day of working out was going to undo all of my hard work... then I missed the first day, and then two days in a row... and then I moved apartments, and days turned into weeks of exercise-free stints.

It seemed like overnight, I looked in the mirror and I realized I was not the strong, fit person I once was. I did not like the person I saw in the mirror. I was angry with her for letting herself go, after all that hard work. And I know it wasn't overnight. And I know, despite what people say about "enablers" in our lives, the only person to blame for my slipping back is myself.

So - here we are. I'm ready to get back to it. Once I finish my first run of Insanity:MAX 30, I plan on taking my round 1 "after" pictures, and starting the program over again - and maybe starting a new program, but we will see. So far, I've been working on just committing to workout on the days I'm supposed to and not completely unravelling if I miss a day. And since this is the beginning of Month #2, I'm pretty happy with myself for sticking with it. I feel like this is how habits start. :)

In any case, I will try to post weekly updates to help keep myself accountable.

Cheers!